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Post  THISLOSERHERE Fri Dec 11, 2015 1:55 am

It was just like the door from their own session. It stood tall in front of their group, eight children and three trolls, the knob a glistening spiralgraph sphere. Everyone was nervous, the air tense with the combined anxieties.

"Dave?" Karkat asked in a small voice. "What if... What if we don't come with you?"

The fruit of their labors was staring them smack dab in the face, a trophy of universal proportions presenting itself for their rightful taking. And yet as Karkat's voice registered into words, he found himself wondering the exact same thing. What would happen? Where would they go?

It just made him squeeze Karkat's hand even tighter. "I don't know, Karks." He mumbled quietly. "But even if we're split up, that won't change anything between us. I'll still be red for you." He looked down at him, vermillion hues behind tinted shades looking over his partner. "Don't ever doubt that. If we split up geographically, we'll just find each other."

"But" Karkat's normally boisterous voice was soft now, "But what if I don't get to go?"

"You don't have anywhere else to go, babe. Your planet and mine are gone." He murmured. "Our game sessions intersected. Surely you'll be able to come as well." He hoped, anyway.

"The game's never done us any favors before" Karkat pointed out, ever the pessimist as he gripped Dave's hand tighter than before, afraid to loose him.

Ahead of them, John was reaching for the handle.

"The game is beat, babe. It can't do anything to us anymore." He pulled Karkat's hand to his lips, pressing a kiss to the back of it. "I'll wait for you."

Karkat pressed his lips into a thin line, pushing his panic down. He nodded. "I'll find you, I'll find you or I'll wait for you to find me, I promise"

As John opened the door, everyone was bathed in a blinding light and a shrill noise cut the air.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Karkat woke with a gasp, his lusus jumping off the bed and scuttling out the door with a shriek that would inevitably bring his guardian in to check on him. He ran his hand over his face, trying to compose himself.
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Post  Ripe Fri Dec 11, 2015 2:53 am

The raucous screaming of a lusus tore Kankri from the esthetic throes of lecture some poor soul on the ethics of troll-human interaction with little mercy, abruptly shattering his brilliant thought process and destroying all hopes of converting another to a more equal way of thinking.  Well.  For now.  It was not without a moan and puff of hot air that he tore himself from his husktop to ascend the curve of stairs leading to the respiteblock of his ward.

Their lusus passed him midway, offered some alarmed clicks and wails and then continued on down.  Kankri rapped his fingers next to the ajar door for politeness sake only, then strode in without another word.  Karkat was awake of course, looking about as distressed as their luses had been.  A light sheen of sweat covered his skin, and Kankri found his lips pulling downwards in disdain.

"More dreams?" he questioned, lips pursed.

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Post  THISLOSERHERE Fri Dec 11, 2015 3:08 am

Karkat opened his mouth to respond, only to be cut off by the same shrill noise that had interrupted his dream. It was a neighbor's lusus, screeching out in the yard as it played with its troll. "Fucking obnoxious grubs" Karkat snapped in response. "I didn't dream" he lied, swinging his legs out of bed to put them on the cool floor. "and even if I did, why would I tell you, so you could spew more shit out of your protein chute?"

He wasn't about to tell Kankri that he was grateful for the young troll and its lusus waking him up before his dream took a turn for the worst, and he had to relive feeling Dave be ripped from his arms as the light from the new session washed over them and made the world anew. "Are you just going to stare at me from my doorway like some sort of grub predator all day, or is there a plan?"
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Post  Ripe Fri Dec 11, 2015 2:04 pm

"I find your choice of words to be both offensive and appalling," Kankri responded, disgust riding high in his voice. It was almost an involuntary reaction now to begin correcting the minds of those who knew no better than to speak in such a crude and uneducated manner, but in this one instance Kankri put a cap on it before he could get started. Experience had slowly, steadfastly, and with much resistance to the fact proven time and time again that it was better to not bother with turning Karkat's thoughts around if he ever wanted to accomplish anything in a day. Life brought previously forgotten time limits to everything, and Kankri was eager to return to his blogging, where lack of face-to-face communication made it easy to say all on his mind without interruption.

"The plan was to check in on you and return to my own duties," he said, nose upturned and sniffing in disdain. "But you seem all too ready to act like a wriggler and hide behind useless assurances of dishonesty instead."

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Post  THISLOSERHERE Sat Dec 12, 2015 12:51 am

"So essentially, you wanted to make sure fish-sticks didn't kill me in my sleep to fulfill your daily dose of 'taking care of me' before you lock yourself up in your respiteblock and chew people out online where you can hide behind a husktop screen and pretend you're better than everyone else" Karkat replied. "While expecting me to find my own source of entertainment no doubt, not even stopping to think that I might, I don't know, be fucking sick and tired of being stuck in this hive interacting with only you all day?"

Karkat pushed himself out of bed and moved to his dresser to get some clothes. "Whatever. I'll just go for a walk and wander around town for a while. Maybe I'll find something less boring to do"
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Post  Ripe Sat Dec 12, 2015 2:22 am

"If you wanted to do something then you could have put forth a suggestion, or made some comment about your displeasure with the current state of affairs earlier, Karkat. You know that I am not privy to the thoughts that go on in your thinkpan," Kankri sighed, feeling for all the world like he had had this conversation before. "Perhaps if you shared them with me rather than your usual offensive, vulgar tirades, we could stop having these disagreements." Karkat didn't seem to care one way or another about his comments, but continued to stomp angrily around his room, gathering enough layers for the colder night weather. Kankri sighed loudly, irritation mounting, and again when he still failed to capture the younger's attention. Trolls around this sweep were always hard to deal with; he was beginning to feel like an unvalued human mother.

"Well if you are going out there, at least be careful. Can you agree to that much?" It was still fairly early in the night, and enough trolls and oddball humans would be out that he shouldn't run into trouble, but it still caused the uncomfortable sensation of nerves to curl in his mid-section. Even if his leaving did result in a quicker return to his husktop, Kankri doubted he would be able to fully enjoy himself until Karkat returned.

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Post  THISLOSERHERE Sat Dec 12, 2015 2:40 am

"No" Karkat finally replied, closing the dresser drawer with a snap. "If you want me to be careful so bad, why don't you drag your lazy shameglobes away from your abused husktop and make me?" He glowered at Kankri, just awake for the night and already almost to the end of his proverbial rope. "I know spending any amount of time with or near me is absolute torture to you, especially when you could better use that time absconding from this absolute shit hive in this increasingly intolerant hive grid on your husktop, lying to people and making friends by pretending you're something you're not."

He pushed past Kankri to the hall, headed for the absolution trap. "But whatever. It isn't like you're the only one that's willing to interact with me anymore. It isn't like practically everyone else I meet that isn't a complete shit stain would even give me the time of day, online or off."
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Post  Ripe Mon Dec 14, 2015 2:48 am

The nerve of him! Karkat's moods had gotten the better of Kankri once or twice before, so he took a deep breath now to calm himself and held for five seconds, released and repeated. He was suceeding in wresting himself back under control, but then the younger troll ended his tirade and pushed past Kankri on his way out of the room. It was the straw that broke the "camel's" back, all calm the other had managed to gather gone with his self-restraint.

"Yes Karkat, please continue to take your aggressions out on me if it eases your hurt any. I understand that living here must be difficult for you, and that your lashing out is only a by-product of how confused and upset you must feel," Kankri began, voiding all traces of emotion in his voice as he straightened his posture and began gesturing with one hand. "I only wish that we could get past all of your insults and vulgarities and truly talk about what is troubling you."

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Post  THISLOSERHERE Mon Dec 14, 2015 3:16 am

Karkat stopped in the doorway to the absolution trap. "Confused and upset?" he repeated in disbelief. "I'm not confused, but you can bet your fucking bulge I'm upset!" He turned so Kankri could get the full grunt of his glare. "I'm upset because I haven't been sleeping well, I'm upset that nothing has sounded or tasted appetizing in over a week, I'm upset because I'm stuck in this pail-sucking hive, in the middle of this bulge licking hive grid with the most self-righteous, uppity, self-centered, piss-poor excuse for a spectrum-mate I could possibly have! The whole reason I'm being even remotely aggressive with you, and let's face it, I'm really not because I haven't broken anything yet, is because I'm completely and utterly pissed at you! You're just too fucking busy stroking your ego and shameglobes in front of your stupid fucking husktop to pay me any attention, when you're LITERALLY THE ONLY BEING, NOT JUST THE ONLY TROLL, BUT THE SINGLE, SOLITARY, BEING OF A SOMEWHAT QUESTIONABLE INTELLIGENCE THAT IS NOT OUR LUSUS, IN WHAT JUST MIGHT BE THE WHOLE FUCKING PLANET THAT WILL EVEN GIVE ME THE GOD GIVEN HOUR OF THE DAY!" Karkat snarled.

"SO EXCUSE ME FOR BEING PISSY WHEN YOU GET THAT FUCKING 'I'M CULTURALLY SENSETIVE AND HAVE TO CORRECT EVERYONE AROUND ME FOR EVERYTHING BECAUSE I'M FUCKING BETTER THAN YOU' ATTITUDE WITH ME BECAUSE YOU CAN ACTUALLY PASS AS A FUCKING HUMAN ONLINE AND MAKE FUCKING FRIENDS AND I CAN'T AND YOU HAVE TO LITERALLY FUCKING RUB IT IN MY FACE WHEN I TRY AND INTERACT WITH YOU AND YOU'RE TOO FUCKING BUSY!

DO NOT EVEN PULL THIS SHIT WITH ME RIGHT NOW KANKRI!" Karkat finished, slamming the door shut behind him. So much for that proverbial rope.
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Post  Ripe Mon Dec 14, 2015 2:45 pm

It was the most effective door Karkat had ever slammed in his face. The resounding smack of the heavy wood left him sputtering. With Karkat's words echoing in his head, Kankri's own thoughts were for the moment sparce; stray outbursts of offended "how dare he!" and wispy, puzzled concern over what had just been shouted at him.

There was no sound coming from the other side of the door. Kankri felt for all the world like he was floundering now when throughout the affair he'd kept relatively calm. "Karkat," he tried, then paused, swallowing. What did he have to say? There was still nothing from the other side. "Karkat." His name still sounded too soft coming from Kankri's mouth.

"I think... what you're saying is resoundingly unfair," he hurried on, "but...I believe I see your point. Perhaps I have been neglecting my duties to you as your guardian."

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Post  THISLOSERHERE Mon Dec 14, 2015 11:54 pm

"I call them as I see them!" Karkat snarled through the door. He turned on the water and stepped under the spray to drown out whatever argument Kankri was going to use. He didn't have to wash sopor off like some trolls, but karkat's hair was a force to be reconed with while dry. He has to wash it in the morning unless he wanted to look like a slob the rest of the day.

He was only in the shower long enough to wash, then he was out and drying so he could dress. In the end it was less than ten minutes from when he snapped the lock shut, to when he was opening the door and stepping out into the hall while towel-drying his hair and horns.
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Post  Ripe Wed Dec 16, 2015 1:37 am

Kankri thought he was trying, he really did. It wasn't easy to raise a grub on your own, and for that very reason not many trolls did it. Spectrum mates often grouped together to take care of younger grubs and trolls as they grew, delegating new responsibilities each day so no one troll had too much to do. Kankri, and Karat by extension, did not have that option. Other trolls tended to stay away, or were even expressed hatred due to the color of their blood. It was unfortunate that it meant Karat did not have the same wide net of older trolls that many his own sweep did, but Kankri had always thought that he was doing the best he could, and no one could fault him for that.

Well, he thought as he heard the water start running, apparently he could be. Karat's anger he could handle, but this absolutely refusal to even talk things out and was drawing on his last reserves of patience. He would not wait patiently like some woof beast for its master to return, so Kankri headed back into his room to wait out the duration of the other's shower. The blinking cursor of his unfinished blog message drew his gaze several times, but he let it be. Finishing it now would be unfulfilling. He needed to end this conversation with his ward first.

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Post  THISLOSERHERE Wed Dec 16, 2015 1:51 am

Karkat went back to his own respiteblock, leaving the door open as he noisily rummaged around. He'd probably wind up going out for a walk that would likely last the majority of the night, unless he could find something worthwhile to do within walking distance. There was a park, but most of the other trolls chased him away, even when all he did was sit on the benches. There was that arcade nearly forty minutes away, but the human teenagers nearly always pushed him around.

Karkat sat on the edge of his bed with a sigh, grabbing his husktop off the floor and opening it. Pesterchum was already pulled up, the only handle on his friends list a turnteckGodhead, the grayed out color of an unused username.
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Post  Ripe Wed Dec 16, 2015 2:52 am

When Karkat reached his block Kankri left his. He walked softly, not wanting to appear in any way menacing or gearing up for a fight when he reached the younger troll. Karkat seemed to not have heard him at all though, for he had his husktop opened to pesterchum. Unless he were in the middle of one of his long-winded tirades of hate, he always closed the lid when Kankri came into his block to keep him from seeing what he was up to. The single, grayed out contract seemed very lonely somehow.

"Karkat," Kankri said, clearing his throat. "I had hoped to continue our conversation from earlier." He'd done some planning while Karkat had been in the ablution trap and had the entire exchange planned in his head, but the single chum on Karkat's list would not leave his mind. "What happened to your list of chums? I recall you having more than that."

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Post  THISLOSERHERE Wed Dec 16, 2015 3:00 am

Karkat jumped, slamming the lid of his husktop shut. His face was starting to flush, though it was difficult to tell if it was in anger or embarrassment. "I had to change handles because that list of chums started harassing me when they found out that I'm a freak" he snapped. He shoved the husktop off his lap onto his bed and got up, moving to his closet. "Come to tell me off for screaming at you?" he grumbled. "I'll be out of your fucking hair in a few minutes. There's probably some place within walking distance that I haven't had the shit kicked out of me yet"
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Post  Ripe Wed Dec 16, 2015 3:34 am

"Harassing you?" Kankri repeated. His entire face seemed to pinch, like he couldn't quite comprehend what Karkat was saying. "Why didn't you say something to me about it?" He would have had a stern talking to any troll that would cast insults for something like an abnormal blood color. "These people aren't anyone that you know, are they? People nearby?" In that case, even less reason why Karkat should go out there, especially in such a mood, but he was still gathering things from about his respite block.

"Will you just stand still for a moment?"

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Post  THISLOSERHERE Wed Dec 16, 2015 3:44 am

"I don't want to" Karkat replied childishly. "And I did say something to you. During one of my 'tantrums'." he even used finger quotes at the word. "They're all just assholes I tried to be friends with online. Then someone doxed my ip address after I'd pissed them off and found out I'm a fucking freak, which they spread like it was their business or some shit. It isn't like someone couldn't have just looked me up by name anyway."
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Post  Ripe Fri Dec 18, 2015 1:26 am

"So you've been being bullied," Kankri said, more for his own benefit than anyone else. Saying it aloud helped something click. How much? And had it stopped? His fists clenched of their own accord at his side. Something akin to the fiery passion he felt when blogging was starting to stir in him. " Something must be done about this. Intolerance and prejudice toward any member of the hemospetrum in this day and age is unacceptable! Is this still going on?"

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Post  THISLOSERHERE Fri Dec 18, 2015 1:52 am

"Do I leave the house?" Karkat answered Kankri's question with another question. "I changed all my user information for everything, and I keep away from the instigators. Which basically means I don't talk to anyone online anymore." He gestured at the doorway. "And I barely go outside, unless I'm dying to get the hell away from you, so the only time I get the shit kicked out of me is then. Yes Kankri, I am bullied.

"I am a small troll with a short temper that happens to have a louder than normal voice and small horns. That combined with the fact that I am a mutant blood, yes I know that you are too but let me get to my point, that combined with the fact that I am a mutant blood whose irises are starting to fill with my blood color makes me a prime target for any bullying because fuck if humans care if trolls beat the shit out of other trolls so long as they're not disturbing other humans, and like fuck are other trolls going to care because I don't even belong on the fucking hemospectrum!"
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Post  Ripe Fri Dec 18, 2015 2:38 am

For the first time of the entire night, Karkat was not screaming, not shouting obscenities and absurd notions. Just... talking, as Kankri had wanted him to do all along, and he was finding that he didn't like it. How was it possible that all of this had been happening right under his nose? He, who was sworn protector of all individual rights, troll or human, had not known that his own ward was going through such things? The very notion of his own ineptitude and intentional? blindness made him feel queasy.

He didn't know what to say. Kankri had encountered much hatred for many reasons, and had developed a sort of skin against it all. Karkat had always been an emotional blowup since his hatch day. He couldn't say that things would change, or that they could move somewhere with more tolerant trolls. Karkat wouldn't listen to something like that anyways. "Well. I suppose there isn't anything we can do about that. But strength in numbers may deter you from any attacks outside. If you still planned on going outside, I will accompany you."

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Post  THISLOSERHERE Fri Dec 18, 2015 2:49 am

"What's the point?" Karkat shrugged. "There isn't anything to do. I don't have much money so the arcade won't be that worthwhile, even if I get left alone. I wish there was a library or museum closer. My other option is to go back to bed." he shoved his hands in his pockets. "I'm sorry I bothered you"
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Post  Ripe Wed Dec 23, 2015 2:13 am

A dismal and unhappy Karkat was even more insufferable than an angry and screaming Karkat. Kankri had seen him fall into mood swings like this before, but it had always been from his seat at his husktop. If he left Karkat alone for long enough, he would soon be back to his usual ways. He supposed he'd been given the go-ahead to do just that now, but the notion of leaving things like this didn't sit right with him.

"Nonsense," Kankri snapped. "You always bother me, no point in apologizing for it now. Put on your jacket; we're going out. You wanted to do something different, right?"

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Post  THISLOSERHERE Wed Dec 23, 2015 9:33 pm

Karkat immediately fixed Kankri with a suspicious look. "Yes?" he replied, moving to do what the elder candy blood had instructed, but still not turning away from him. An unpredictable Kankri was unusual and normally wound up being unpleasant for those on the receiving end, which would be Karkat in this instance.
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Post  Ripe Wed Dec 23, 2015 10:26 pm

Now that he had Karkat doing what he wanted, Kankri told him to wait a moment as he headed to his own room to grab his jacket. Several ideas were running through his head, lectures and performances he had wanted to go to in his own time, but not necessarily something that would hold Karkat's attention. He finally settled on one in particular and returned to the room to find Karkat moping about and looking a tad lost.

"We'll be going to the aquarium," Kankri announced, pleased to see the surprise that passed his face. "There is a very interesting exhibit going on right now that gives you a look into previously unseen facets of sea dwelling living and lifestyle. It sounds like it would be an educational experience for the both of us."

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Post  THISLOSERHERE Wed Dec 23, 2015 10:33 pm

Karkat couldn't hide his surprise, but he couldn't hide his pleasure at the idea either. "That sounds... Nice" he stated. The aquarium sounded like an idea he could honestly get behind, and it seemed like something that wouldn't cause the two mutant bloods to fight, since they both would be learning about something that interested them. "Yeah, I'd like that"
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